Posted by: Derek Guyer | March 30, 2009

A Home Left in Ruins

“An Adulterous woman consumes a man, then wipes her mouth and says, ‘What’s wrong with that?'”

Proverbs 30:20 NLT

I’m in a position where I’m watching home after home suffer in the hands of adulterous men and women. Some of these situations are so horrific you can’t help but wonder what’s wrong with people today. How could they do these things to one another? How did it get this bad?

For me, the most unreal part of all of it is the frightening reality that most of the people we’re helping call themselves “Christians”. Unfortunately, most of these people seem to be hiding behind a mask of Christianity. It’s the mask too many “Christians” are wearing these days of playing what I call “checklist Christianity”:

  • Wearing my tie…check
  • Kids took baths and are dressed…check
  • Makeup looks good…check
  • Stay awake through an hour long worship service at church…check
  • Smile and nod at people on my way back out of the building…check
  • Find somewhere to eat Sunday dinner in our nice clothes…check
  • Take a nap and go back to real life…check

This indifferent, lazy attitude towards Christ Jesus and obeying His commandments has corroded our society and the church for far too long. We’re living in society where homes are crumbling all around us. Many of the culprits at the center of it are these adulterous men and women who have turned on their spouses and far more importantly, the God of all the Universe. They’ve betrayed their own words, their homes, the church, and as a result, God’s people are in shambles.

I’ve watched the effects of what adulterous men and women can do to each others lives and even experienced it first hand. I lost my business, the twin boys we were adopting, and our home to the effects of sin’s fearsome hand because of my own wife’s sins. Satan stuck his ugly head into our home and and left our life in ruins.

Adultery leaves a mess of mistrust, betrayal, and pain behind like few other sins. When Satan digs his claws in through the sin of adultery, he roars and cheers as he watches the blood of his victims being shed. He clings as hard and long as he can and when the mess he’s created is just about to surface and be made known, he makes the leaving of it more painful than anything you could ever imagine as he continues to cling to the sinner and do everything within his power to hold them back. His claws rip through their skin with such violence as they run that they are often never the same people. Not only are homes destroyed forever, but so are many of their hearts.

To quote the Apostle Paul, “these things ought not to be so’…

If you’re in an affair, leave it now. Don’t walk, run. Leave your life of sin before Satan destroys your home completely. If you’re considering an affair, turn and run. Now. Don’t wait for Satan to tempt you with another word or glance. Run.

“Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour. Stand firm against him, and be strong in your faith.”

I Peter 5:8-9 NLT

Your home may be in ruins, but my home is evidence that it doesn’t have to stay that way. “Stand firm against him and be strong in your faith.” God can and will redeem you.


  1. I pray that my wife and I eventually can rejoice in our rebuilt marriage, much like you are able to do.

    I applaud your ability to realize that God is the one who changes peoples hearts, not facts, or embarassment.

    It couldn’t be more clear cut that you know what you are talking about.

    I have enjoyed every post I have read here. No hype, no drama – just the facts, and God’s word.

    I will be here for a while looking at what else your blog has to offer.

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